Category Archives: Nigeria

Why Nigerian banks will never lend you a dime

We all go broke at different times, and the natural thing would be to turn to our bankers. After all, we have been putting our meager savings in there for a while; and one good turn deserves another, right? Wrong! You are probably rolling your eyes now because we all know that Nigerian banks hardly […]

Nigerian elites will be losers again, bigly!

While it seems that MTN has an uncanny ability for strolling from a frying pan ($5B fine), into the fire ($8B refund), and then amble into a lava pit ($2B tax arguments), one thing that caught my eyes was the sheer magnitude of the $8b dividend that MTN has remitted to the mothership since 2001. […]

Whatsapp banking is bad news

A few weeks ago, Access Bank, First Bank, UBA, and ABSA in South Africa came to the market to inform everyone they would be rolling out Whatsapp banking in a few weeks. The announcements came with so much fanfare I thought a new king of Africa was being announced. Access Bank’s body dey catch. They launched their Whatsapp banking yesterday to consternation […]

Three reasons why current accounts are for dinosaurs

When I started working as a new hire, one of the things shoved down my long throat was my salary account, which was a current account. I didn’t know my left from my right as the account was free to use so all the complaints of charges that customers were screaming about were like cold […]

A rant about the evolution of telephony in Nigeria

A long time ago, when chicken had teeth, the whole of Nigeria (not half of it, the whole!) had 400,000 lines for 80 million people. Of course, only the rich had these phones. Everyone went to the business center to make calls and do Yahoo faxes. Or you climb a tree and shout yourself hoarse […]