A safe place to rant
Akpor asks teacher: Excuse me ma, if you mix Omo and Klin, will there be foam?
Teacher responds: Yes of course, why ask such a stupid question at the beginning of the year, are you going to pass this class at all?
Akpor laughs and whisper to the other kids, such a dumb teacher, how can you get foam without adding water, are we going to know anything at all with dis teacher?
Posted while on the move
Akpor: Mom you lied to me.
Mum: How?.
Akpor: You said my brother is a small angel
Mum: Yes he is.
Akpor: He didn’t fly when I threw him from the balcony.
Posted while on the move.
Thank God, Akpos finally hammer and buys a new Automatic BMW X6 sport.
He drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night the car just won’t move at all.
He tries driving the car at night for a week but still no luck.
He then furiously calls the BMW dealers and they sent out a technician to him.
The technician asks,
“Sir, are you sure you are using the right gears?”
Full of anger Akpos replies,
“You fool, idiot man, how you could ask such a question, I’m not stupid! I use D for the Day and N for the Night.”
Posted while on the move.
A woman woke up at her own funeral. She was so shocked that she had a heart attack and died.
This is what some of the great men have thought about marriage and Women….. Some when trying to be humorous…… What a shame.
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. –David Bissonette
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher. — Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things and prevents us from achieving them. — Dumas
The great question, which I have not been able to answer is, “What does a woman want? — Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. -Sam Gromwell
“I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.” – Sam Kinison
“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.” -James Holt McGavran
“The secret of a successful marriage is not to be at home too much.” – Colin Chapman
“I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t.” – Patrick Murray
My wife doesn’t care what I do away from home, as long as I don’t enjoy it. – Stanley Greaves
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his check book open. — Groucho Marx
My wife only has two complaints. Nothing to wear and not enough closet space. – Crasto
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. — Henny Youngman
A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong. — Milton Berle
Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won’t be reporting it. The thief spent less than my wife did. – Rodney Dangerfield